Saturday, November 20, 2010

Feeding Problems and Freedom

We are having many problems related to feeding lately. When Cole is here with me I am able to breastfeed the babies with no problems, but when Cole isn't here I just don't have the time nor hands to sit and breastfeed all day. Grace needs lots of attention and is always testing her boundaries so I need to be able to respond quickly to her, but with 2 babies on my boob that seems impossible. So when Cole is at work I bottle feed, mostly formula. If I'm lucky I can convince Grace to let me pump 1-2 times a day, which is maybe enough for one baby each pump. For some reason I've never been a great pumper, my boobs just don't respond as well to a pump.

Emma will take a bottle just fine, but is having the worst gas. The poor thing just screams and screams until she's able to pass gas. We've been giving her mylicon and gripe water, but neither seem to give her much relief. Nothing seems to help her gas pain, not holding her, not laying on her belly, not baths, not warm compresses...nothing. Emma has also been taking her Zantac without complaint, and I think it's helping her reflux a little.

Carter on the other hand is a nightmare. The poor kid, just can't get the suck-swallow-breathe reflex. Most times he eats the ends up snorting and spitting the formula everywhere even causing it to come out of his nose. He's just miserable!  It takes me close to 45 minutes to get him to take 4oz and I'm usually wearing 2 of those ounces. I've tried every bottle and every position under the sun. I do find he does best when sitting almost completely straight up. His reflux is no better, in fact I think it may be worse. Carter HATES his zantac and will do everything possible to make sure that he doesn't swallow it, he gags, he spits, and then pukes it back up.

After struggling through the 3rd feed of the day yesterday I was in tears. I had one baby screaming because he can't eat, another baby screaming from gas pains,  and a toddler that was sad because she was deprived of my attention. I called Cole in tears and he called the Pediatrician. We are thinking that maybe both babies could benefit from a change in formula and either in increase in their Zantac or even a different medication. I'm starting to wonder if Carter's tongue tie is impeding his ability to feed as well, or if all of this is just related to their prematurity. I know they are almost 7 weeks old, but with their adjusted age they are only 2 weeks old, so it would be normal for a 2 week old to still have some problems feeding. Unfortunately Cole wouldn't be able to make it home in time to get us to the doctor's on Friday and the doctor won't make a change in either without seeing the babies, so we have to wait until Monday to come up with another plan.

I was able to regain my composure and make it the rest of the day with the kids. When Cole got home he agreed to stay home with the babies and wait for Early Intervention to come while Grace and I ran some errands. This was my first time driving in months and Cole's first time home alone with the twins. We both did Great! I forgot how nice it is to be alone with Grace and to just be able to drive and sing as loud as I want! Grace napped on our way to Walmart so I was able to just sit in the car and play games on Cole's phone..yay! The babies were very well behaved for Cole and took their bottles without any major problems and even slept most of the time I was gone. While I out I bought a few new bottles for Carter and he seems to be doing a little bit better with the Dr. Brown bottles.

While I was out I had some time to actually sleep while Grace was sleeping. I decided that even though things are really rough right now, staying positive is only going to help. Money's SUPER tight, so Cole is working 7 days a week, with our only car, which means I'm home alone with 3 very cranky kids 7 days a week. Don't get me wrong I love my children and love spending time with them, but sometimes breaks are necessary. So I decided that I need to remind myself to stay positive everyday, whether it's with a inspirational quote, or song, or even just getting up and dancing with the kids.

So my positive quote of the day is:

"Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results." Willie Nelson


The song that makes me want to get up and dance today is Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"


And if you made it this far, thanks for listening.... err reading!