Where Am I Now? Come Say Hi!
6 years ago
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Silly Girl
Auntie and Uncle Josh bought Carter this awesome race track for his birthday. It is a huge hit in our house! Carter loves to throw random toys in the middle to watch them spin. Emma likes to do this:
Emma thinks this is the greatest seat ever. Emma also likes to try to stand on it when it's spinning, she's quite the little dare devil!
Sunday, April 17, 2011
"Pri-cy!"
This is what happens when you give your 2.5 year old "pri-cy!" in the bathroom.
"Mommy I needed toyly paper, it all fall down!"
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Oh Gracie
Grace is such a goof and lately she has said some of the silliest things:
The other day I asked her who she was going to marry, her response "umm...a pirate!" Oh man, I hope not!
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I was asking Grace questions about her wedding the other night,
Me: Will you have a wedding party?
Grace: No
Me: Will you wear a white dress?
G: No, pink, purple, and green!
M: Oh, that sounds pretty. Will you have flowers?
G: No! Ballons...2 purple, a pink, and blue one. What you wear Mama?
M: Hmm, probably a black dress and black shoes.
G: No black shoes...yellow shoes!
M: Wow that sounds like the prettiest wedding ever!
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We were at the mall this past weekend and went to say hi to the Easter bunny, but there was a sign up saying he was at lunch. We relayed this message to Grace and her response was "Yea, he's probably eating the eggs!" Apparently Grace is under the impression that the Easter bunny takes your eggs and eats them, not hid them!
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Last night
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I told Grace that she was going to be going to school next year and she got all excited and started jumping around saying she wanted to go now. I told her she'd go in September near her birthday, she seemed okay with that until I was taking her upstairs for her nap, she said "Mama, where'd my birf-day go?"
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AT 7am on Saturday morning Grace ran over to me and said "Mama put on music, I NEED TO DANCE!"
The other day I asked her who she was going to marry, her response "umm...a pirate!" Oh man, I hope not!
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I was asking Grace questions about her wedding the other night,
Me: Will you have a wedding party?
Grace: No
Me: Will you wear a white dress?
G: No, pink, purple, and green!
M: Oh, that sounds pretty. Will you have flowers?
G: No! Ballons...2 purple, a pink, and blue one. What you wear Mama?
M: Hmm, probably a black dress and black shoes.
G: No black shoes...yellow shoes!
M: Wow that sounds like the prettiest wedding ever!
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We were at the mall this past weekend and went to say hi to the Easter bunny, but there was a sign up saying he was at lunch. We relayed this message to Grace and her response was "Yea, he's probably eating the eggs!" Apparently Grace is under the impression that the Easter bunny takes your eggs and eats them, not hid them!
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Last night
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I told Grace that she was going to be going to school next year and she got all excited and started jumping around saying she wanted to go now. I told her she'd go in September near her birthday, she seemed okay with that until I was taking her upstairs for her nap, she said "Mama, where'd my birf-day go?"
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AT 7am on Saturday morning Grace ran over to me and said "Mama put on music, I NEED TO DANCE!"
Friday, March 18, 2011
Boogie Face
Yesterday I tried to get a cute little picture of Carter's feet and this is what I got instead...
she's such a goof ball!
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Funny Grace
Grace says the funniest things...they are often so weird, but they make me laugh!
A few recent Grace-isms:
While I was changing Carter's diaper yesterday
Grace: "What dat Mama?" (pointing to Carter's balls..)
Me: "Those are Carter's testicles. (confused look from Grace) They're his balls."
Grace: "Oh I have balls!?" looking in her undies "Mama, Grace no have balls!"
Me: "Nope, only boys have balls hunny."
Grace: "but I like balls. Balls are fun!"
....dies laughing....
Tonight I made Cole and I a salad for dinner. I asked Grace if she wanted some lettuce.
Grace: "No I eat lettuce. Lettuce ucky, it make me sick. I'll throw up. I eat Princess soup!"
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While on the potty tonight...
Grace: "Mama, no eat poopy!"
Mama: "No we should NOT eat poop, that is very yucky! It will make you very sick."
Grace: "Ya, no eat Gracie poop. I eat Lily poop?"
Mama: "No we don't eat any poop, that's very yucky!"
Grace: "Yay, no eat Lily poop, no eat Daddy poop, no eat Mommy poop, no eat Emma poop, no eat Carter poop."
gag...gag....gag
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Grace is also on a I love everything kick. Things she's loves recently:
"I love dis soup!"
"I love dis pants"
"I love dis floor"
"I love dis bowl"
"I love dis paper"
"I love mail"
"I love dis shoes"
Where does she come up with these things!!?
A few recent Grace-isms:
While I was changing Carter's diaper yesterday
Grace: "What dat Mama?" (pointing to Carter's balls..)
Me: "Those are Carter's testicles. (confused look from Grace) They're his balls."
Grace: "Oh I have balls!?" looking in her undies "Mama, Grace no have balls!"
Me: "Nope, only boys have balls hunny."
Grace: "but I like balls. Balls are fun!"
....dies laughing....
Tonight I made Cole and I a salad for dinner. I asked Grace if she wanted some lettuce.
Grace: "No I eat lettuce. Lettuce ucky, it make me sick. I'll throw up. I eat Princess soup!"
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While on the potty tonight...
Grace: "Mama, no eat poopy!"
Mama: "No we should NOT eat poop, that is very yucky! It will make you very sick."
Grace: "Ya, no eat Gracie poop. I eat Lily poop?"
Mama: "No we don't eat any poop, that's very yucky!"
Grace: "Yay, no eat Lily poop, no eat Daddy poop, no eat Mommy poop, no eat Emma poop, no eat Carter poop."
gag...gag....gag
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Grace is also on a I love everything kick. Things she's loves recently:
"I love dis soup!"
"I love dis pants"
"I love dis floor"
"I love dis bowl"
"I love dis paper"
"I love mail"
"I love dis shoes"
Where does she come up with these things!!?
Saturday, February 5, 2011
"Poop on Potty"
Ever since we started potty training Grace (almost 2 weeks now!) she's always telling Emma and Carter how they need to "poop on big potty! No poppy in diappie!!" So the other day when Carter was pooping After Grace explained to him again about "No poppy in diappie Carter!" I thought I'd please her by putting him on her potty....she was so proud of him!!
and just because it's cute
"Carter is that you??"
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Big Duck!!!
We don't really watch Sesame Street in this house, (it just has never kept Grace's interest) but we do have lots of Sesame Street books, so Grace knows some of the main characters. The other day we were reading one of the Sesame Street book and this is the conversation we had
Grace- while pointing at the page "Big Duck, Big Duck Mama!"
Me- "Um, I think you mean Big Bird!"
Grace- "Ya, Big bird...and Mama look Big Cookie Monster, and Big Elmo..."
Me- dies laughing!!!!
Grace- while pointing at the page "Big Duck, Big Duck Mama!"
Me- "Um, I think you mean Big Bird!"
Grace- "Ya, Big bird...and Mama look Big Cookie Monster, and Big Elmo..."
Me- dies laughing!!!!
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Why having a toddler is like a frat party!
I recently came across this blog on Suburban Snapshots and I just thought it was to funny not to share!
10. There are half-full, brightly-colored plastic cups on the floor in every room. Three are in the bathtub.
9. There's always that one girl, bawling her eyes out in a corner.
8. It's best not to assume that the person closest to you has any control over their digestive function.
7. You sneak off to the bathroom knowing that as soon as you sit down, someone's going to start banging on the door.
6. Probably 80% of the stains on the furniture contain DNA.
5. You've got someone in your face at 3 a.m. looking for a drink.
4. There's definitely going to be a fight.
3. You're not sure whether anything you're doing is right, you just hope it won't get you arrested.
2. There are crumpled-up underpants everywhere.
1. You wake up wondering exactly how and when the person in bed with you got there.
Why Having a Toddler is Like Being at a Frat Party
10. There are half-full, brightly-colored plastic cups on the floor in every room. Three are in the bathtub.
9. There's always that one girl, bawling her eyes out in a corner.
8. It's best not to assume that the person closest to you has any control over their digestive function.
7. You sneak off to the bathroom knowing that as soon as you sit down, someone's going to start banging on the door.
6. Probably 80% of the stains on the furniture contain DNA.
5. You've got someone in your face at 3 a.m. looking for a drink.
4. There's definitely going to be a fight.
3. You're not sure whether anything you're doing is right, you just hope it won't get you arrested.
2. There are crumpled-up underpants everywhere.
1. You wake up wondering exactly how and when the person in bed with you got there.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Carter's ENT Update
Cole just called me and him and Carter are on their way home from the ENT. Things went well, there is thankfully no tumor or blockage causing Carter's breathing problems. They put a spaghetti size scope down Carter's nose and throat to get a good look at everything. The doctor said that he is full of mucous, I guess the mixture of his cold and reflux, so it was hard to see everything at first. It looks like his muscles are firing properly when crying, because he was obviously freaking out during the scope, but that they might not be firing right when he is calm, leading to the crazy sounds. Unfortunately or fortunately there isn't really anything to do for this, we just have to kind of wait until he grows out of it. The doctor did prescribe a steroid that we are to put in his nose twice a day. She said this could work great or it could just be more of a nuisance then anything, if that's the case we'll just stop using it and wait for Carter to out grow it. We have an appointment to go back in 2 weeks and see how the steroids are working. Such a sigh of relief!
As a completely funny side note I was talking to Emma and called her a peanut, Grace got very mad at me and said "Emma no p-nus, Emma have gina!" Grace thought I was calling Emma a penis and was mad because Emma has a vagina...oh silly Gracie!
As a completely funny side note I was talking to Emma and called her a peanut, Grace got very mad at me and said "Emma no p-nus, Emma have gina!" Grace thought I was calling Emma a penis and was mad because Emma has a vagina...oh silly Gracie!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Thinking of Having Kids?
I saw this posted online and could not stop laughing!
Thinking of Having Kids? Do this 11 step program first!
Lesson 1
1. Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the newspaper.
5. Read it for the last time.
Lesson 2
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their.
1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child’s breastfeeding ,sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behaviour. Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.
Lesson 3
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel.
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)
2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm for 3AM.
5. As you can’t get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)
Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.
Lesson 4
Can you stand the mess children make? To find out.
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favourite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?
Lesson 5
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this – all morning.
Lesson 6
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don’t think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don’t look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the backseat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.
Lesson 7
Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week’s groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys.
Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.
Lesson 8
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.
You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.
Lesson 9
Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you’re thinking What’s'Noggin’?) Exactly the point.
Lesson 10
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying ‘mommy’ repeatedly.(Important: no more than a four second delay between each ‘mommy’;occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this
tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now readyto take a long trip with a toddler.
Lesson 11
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the ‘mommy’ tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.
Thinking of Having Kids? Do this 11 step program first!
Lesson 1
1. Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the newspaper.
5. Read it for the last time.
Lesson 2
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their.
1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child’s breastfeeding ,sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behaviour. Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.
Lesson 3
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel.
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)
2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm for 3AM.
5. As you can’t get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)
Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.
Lesson 4
Can you stand the mess children make? To find out.
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favourite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?
Lesson 5
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this – all morning.
Lesson 6
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don’t think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don’t look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the backseat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.
Lesson 7
Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week’s groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys.
Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.
Lesson 8
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.
You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.
Lesson 9
Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you’re thinking What’s'Noggin’?) Exactly the point.
Lesson 10
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying ‘mommy’ repeatedly.(Important: no more than a four second delay between each ‘mommy’;occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this
tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now readyto take a long trip with a toddler.
Lesson 11
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the ‘mommy’ tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
"That's Gross!"
This has become Grace's new favorite phrase! Here are a few of our conversations from today alone:
(Convo #1)
Grace: "Daddy kisses before you go!"
Cole gives Grace a kiss before leaving for hockey
Grace: "Gross Daddy, brush your teeth!"
Haha the best part is that Cole just brushed his teeth! This sent Cole into a panic about his breath, he made me smell his breath and his beard before he would leave. (He smelt fine by the way!)
(Convo #2)
Grace was giving Emma kisses on the mouth and Emma kept smiling, just as I was tearing up from the display of sisterly love Grace yells "Eww, that's gross!" and wipes her mouth and moves on to playing with her dolls. sigh, well it was a sweet moment for a second!
(Convo #3)
Grace was watching Beauty and the Beast (for the millionth time!) and she said "Mama, sheep eat Belle's book! That's gross! Eat own food sheep!"
(Convo #4)
Grace was telling Cassie about how EI is coming tomorrow and decided she needed to say "Mama vacuum rug, it's gross!" Thanks kiddo, I do need to vacuum before EI comes and sits on the floor.
Such a silly girl! Toddlers are silly, strange creatures!
(Convo #1)
Grace: "Daddy kisses before you go!"
Cole gives Grace a kiss before leaving for hockey
Grace: "Gross Daddy, brush your teeth!"
Haha the best part is that Cole just brushed his teeth! This sent Cole into a panic about his breath, he made me smell his breath and his beard before he would leave. (He smelt fine by the way!)
(Convo #2)
Grace was giving Emma kisses on the mouth and Emma kept smiling, just as I was tearing up from the display of sisterly love Grace yells "Eww, that's gross!" and wipes her mouth and moves on to playing with her dolls. sigh, well it was a sweet moment for a second!
(Convo #3)
Grace was watching Beauty and the Beast (for the millionth time!) and she said "Mama, sheep eat Belle's book! That's gross! Eat own food sheep!"
(Convo #4)
Grace was telling Cassie about how EI is coming tomorrow and decided she needed to say "Mama vacuum rug, it's gross!" Thanks kiddo, I do need to vacuum before EI comes and sits on the floor.
Such a silly girl! Toddlers are silly, strange creatures!
Monday, December 6, 2010
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Bear Hugs
I told Grace last night to give Cole a bear hug, so she went & got her bear & made it hug Cole. Not exactly what I meant but so cute! I love the way toddlers think sometimes!
Friday, January 29, 2010
Things I Never Thought I'd Say...
"Grace don't put your fingers in your nose."
"Don't put your peas in your nose. Peas are for eating, not for putting in your nose. If you keep putting the peas in your nose I'll have to take them away"
While on the potty..."Please be nice to your vagina." Grace then proceeds to pat it like a kitty saying "niiice" then she tries to bend over and kiss it. "Grace, we don't kiss our vaginas that's yucky."
"Please leave Lily's bum alone."
"Please get your hand out of Jacob's pants. Those are Jacob's pants please leave them on."
"Please get your hand out of my pants, that's Mama's bum."
"Please, don't lick Lily, that's yucky"
"Can you use your hands when you eat, you're not a puppy dog."
"Please don't put your dinner in your belly button."
She certainly is one silly toddler!
"Don't put your peas in your nose. Peas are for eating, not for putting in your nose. If you keep putting the peas in your nose I'll have to take them away"
While on the potty..."Please be nice to your vagina." Grace then proceeds to pat it like a kitty saying "niiice" then she tries to bend over and kiss it. "Grace, we don't kiss our vaginas that's yucky."
"Please leave Lily's bum alone."
"Please get your hand out of Jacob's pants. Those are Jacob's pants please leave them on."
"Please get your hand out of my pants, that's Mama's bum."
"Please, don't lick Lily, that's yucky"
"Can you use your hands when you eat, you're not a puppy dog."
"Please don't put your dinner in your belly button."
She certainly is one silly toddler!
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Still Nada
Still no ovulation.
Still waiting.
Today is day 17 in my cycle. It's not looking so good for us this month.
In other news, since I've started eating healthier I've been buying peppers to snack on. When I buy them I get the bag with one red, one orange, and one yellow pepper in it. I probably have bought 3-4 bags by now. I kid you not, but in every bag there has been a pregnant pepper, you know a pepper that has another little baby pepper inside, like so:
I feel like somebody must be testing me. I mean, come on..even my peppers can get pregnant! Well the bag I bought last week had 2, yes 2 out of the 3, pregnant peppers! I bought another bag today to cut up for the week and again 2 pregnant peppers!
If only I could be as fertile as a pepper!
Still waiting.
Today is day 17 in my cycle. It's not looking so good for us this month.
In other news, since I've started eating healthier I've been buying peppers to snack on. When I buy them I get the bag with one red, one orange, and one yellow pepper in it. I probably have bought 3-4 bags by now. I kid you not, but in every bag there has been a pregnant pepper, you know a pepper that has another little baby pepper inside, like so:
If only I could be as fertile as a pepper!
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Friday, December 18, 2009
Best Game EVER!
We were at the Brennans' Wednesday night babysitting the boys and Grace came up with the best game EVER!
She would wave goodbye, blow me kisses, I'd say "Have fun at work!"
She'd get into the cabinet and close it.
Then she'd open it up and run and give me a big hug and kiss and I'd say "I missed you!"
We must've played this for 15 straight minutes. Any games that involve endless hugs and kisses are great in my book!
Silly Girl
Grace's new thing is she tries to lift everything and anything. Well, last night she started trying to lift Lily and kept doing it again this morning....poor Lily.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Now I remember
Last night Grace saw her ride-on train that she got for her birthday. I had put it away and thought "oh, she hasn't played with this in a while." Yay, well after it was out for maybe 2 minutes I soon remembered why I had put it away.
Yup! Needless to say the train is going back away for a while!
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